I do have this blog to just vent so...

I've been alone for awhile.
A long time.
I had no one to turn to.
Until you.
I had prayed and prayed.
And then you turned up.
Out of nowhere.
You came back.
Like a ghost.
But then you were gone for awhile more.
I don't know
Why we started talking
again
but we did.

You were the first to wish me
Happy Birthday.
12:28am
Then somehow we didn't talk
as much
but we still did.
So when you were there for me
in the light of death
It made me so happy
And I realized
That you were a great friend
And that made me
happy.
A friend. Finally.

I didn't care
that you had a girlfriend
or that you
acted like you didn't.
Maybe that was you.
I didn't know this you before that night.
A week later.
Not the same, but still
a comfort.
Thank God.
You were there and I was finally
happy. again.

So now, or yesterday
When the thunder is breaking
and the lightening is slapping.
You...aren't?
When I feel more alone then ever
It's you that I turn to.
So where are you?
Gone.
And there's warnings and more storms
I'm more alone then ever.
And I have no one
to turn to.

What happened?
To that happiness you made
me feel?
That I finally felt was right.
Because I had been sad
for so long.
What happens now?
That I'm still alone?
2 weeks ago you were begging
for me to come over.
And now I'm staying up
crying.
Because I'm alone.

Thanks so much.
Tell me, God.
What does this mean?
Or did you mean to trick me
like this?
-S.